When my pregnancy started I thought for sure I would be the person that posts a weekly "bumpdate". I didn't want to overdo it ever, but I definitely thought by now there would be thirty side-profile pictures of me up on my Instagram. You know how many there actually are? Three. Three side views and maybe seven or eight total posts pertaining to the pregnancy in general. I've definitely ended up keeping to myself a lot this pregnancy, which in many ways has made it that much more special and intimate between my husband and me.
I don't know if seeing the "3" at the front of the week count makes it seem that much more real or if it's the hormones, but I'm definitely feeling more sentimental than I have been. I fully intend to do a post about the journey in general from the moment I found out up until those last couple weeks before our little man arrives, but today I just wanted to put down some thoughts that I've had this week:
- I had hoped I would gain all my weight in my belly (wishful thinking I know), but a quick glance at my hips and legs shows that has not been the case. However, I'm not as stressed out by the weight gain as I thought I would be. The doctor says I'm healthy and baby is healthy and that's good enough for me. Additionally, I've been blessed in that up to this point I have had minimal discomfort. I continue to brace myself as I know there are approximately ten weeks ahead of me where that can change. If the extra weight gain is the worst thing so far, then I have no reason to complain about anything.
- I feel worse about cancelling plans now than I did pre-pregnancy, which is silly because I have a pretty valid excuse at this point. I don't know if it's because I know how fleeting this freedom to get up and go is or because I'm afraid of people not understanding, but I feel so bad with every "I can't make it after all" text I send as I crawl into bed with the sun still up.
- Staying away from pregnancy forums/groups has probably been the best thing for me.
- Reading the comments on any Scary Mommy Facebook post I come across has been the worst.
- I thought making all the "healthy" nutritional decisions would be the one thing I could hang my hat on. But not long into my first trimester the vegetable-loving, macro nutrient-tracking person that used to live in this body packed her bags and hasn't made an appearance since. I'm drinking coffee an average of two times a day, I'm eating food regularly that I had sworn off or reserved for a "treat meal" in the past, and I would be okay if broccoli never entered my diet again. I'm definitely eating healthy foods don't get me wrong, but I'm indulging in cravings and other foods as well. I will never have an experience exactly like this with the same cravings or aversions, and while I try not to overdo it (even though I do - a lot) I'm also okay with the fact that I might not be the model of nutritional habits during pregnancy. I am getting down on some hot cheetos - washed down with La Croix because balance - as I type this. There are those who clutch their pearls as the thought of eating Cheetos while pregnant and that''s okay. That's probably a good thing and I applaud them. But I learned in my first trimester when my body rejected anything that wasn't ginger ale or a taco that keeping baby fed was the most important thing - and again he is healthy - so I am satisfied.
- I am blessed and God is good. These things would be true even if I wasn't pregnant and will continue to be true even if things suddenly get a lot harder or when parenting makes me want to pull all my hair out. I sit and I think about everything leading up to this point and how much I have in general that I do not deserve and the word humbled doesn't even begin to cover it. I don't know why I was chosen to carry this life in my womb. For as many horror stories and complaints as there are I am also fully aware that this whole journey is 100% a blessing and it boggles my mind as to why I should get to experience it. There are a lot of things I've been surprised to find I enjoy about being pregnant, but this constant reminder of God's grace is by far the greatest thing about it all, and in two more months I get to hold him.
This whole post is really random and scattered (a good depiction of my brain at this point) but like I said, the main point of it is for me to record random thoughts I've had that I want to remember. And so before wrapping this up, I just want to talk about Disneyland while pregnant. I've visited the happiest place on Earth at 13, 18, and 27 weeks pregnant (also at 2 but I didn't know it so we won't talk about that).
Is it worth it to go to Disneyland while pregnant?
Yes. At each of those three trips my answer remains a definite yes. If all you like about Disneyland is roller coasters, then it might not be worth it to you. However, you can still ride the majority of the rides and for us it was a chance to watch all of the shows we never wanted to waste precious roller coaster time watching before - and they were actually really good!
What's the worst part of being pregnant in Disneyland?
It's not the lines, it's not the inability to ride stuff, it's not even my feet hurting. It's just being tired. Personally, I found I had way more energy at 27 weeks than at 18 weeks. I don't know if it's because the weight gain seemed more sudden and my body was still adjusting to it at 18 where as by week 27 my body knew this was just life for now or what, but I remember being there at 18 weeks and wanting to constantly just sit or go take a nap. The next time we went though we just went in knowing we would have to go back to the hotel for nap time and it was actually pretty nice, we got to avoid some of the crowd and had the energy to close the park down that night.
What's the best part of being pregnant in Disneyland?
This goes without saying, especially after my whole spiel on indulging in cravings earlier, but the food. There is such a wide variety of cuisine between the two parks and the downtown area that whatever sounds good to you, you can find. We have the Disneyland app and seriously my favorite thing to do while standing in line was scope out all the food options and pick what I wanted to eat later.
I am so glad that our annual passes didn't go to waste during pregnancy. We are hoping to make it at least one more time if only for a day trip before the passes expire mid-December, but even if we don't we have to much contentment knowing we definitely got our money's worth over the last few months. We definitely won't try to make it there again before baby, but we are going on one more pre-baby getaway this weekend for our anniversary/babymoon and then it's all about baby prep!